Derisory Heteroclite (kellydor) wrote,
Derisory Heteroclite

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The 1800's Meet Today

Ever have a dream where you know that you're one of the characters in it, but the view of the show is *not* centered around your character? Let's go one step further and say that you know NONE of the characters in the dream, aside from the character which you happen to *KNOW* is you. Now, change the appearance of your character so far along that it looks absolutely nothing like you. Now, suit them with 19th Century garb and give her the title(job) of something you would certainly NEVER do, at any cost.

I was an 1800's Call-Girl. But not your average whore. I only had one client(my first client) and he fell madly in love with me. The woman who had hired me, warned me against falling in love, in return. The job wasn't to just *sleep* with the client, but to also *advise* them. I guess I don't follow advice myself, very well, because I'd ended up moving in with him.

The next scene entailed me competing logic with two other women(a battle of whits to have the gentleman's hand in marriage). It involved planting a tree in the most timely manner, without a shovel. I had won. The next competition(get this), was how to clean a car and get the toughest of grit and bugs out of the front bumper. Again, I won. The third competition, was that of magic. I did not know any, so I stayed on the side for it. However, when my partner asked that his rear-view mirror go from green, to clear, he requested one of the ladies to change the color. The lady needed specifics and he said "di-chromium oxide", the woman had hell trying to pronounce it. So, even though I may have lost that competition, I worked with her for a minute on the pronunciation. Finally, she got it. The rearview mirror hadn't fully changed, however. You could see a reflection, but only at certain angles. At that point, I applied a bit of bleach(???) to a rag, then wiped it clean.

You would think that as with the direction of the dream, that the television was on in the background. It wasn't. I really am just *that* weird.
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